Wednesday, December 22, 2010

It Is Not A Problem It Is Just The Way It Is

So this Christmas is both different and the same from the last years Christmas.

The same is they are both without Michele.

It is different in that I am staying in Baltimore this year and last year I went home.

I believe both decisions were correct but it still doesn't make looking back different.

Michele's kids, and Sheri's daughter Taylor, are both older and the appeal of hanging out with "old folks" :) doesn't have the same allure lol.

I'm guessing tonight and the next few days are part of the process.

Grieving

Grateful

Confused.

Guess it is what makes us human after all huh?

To all of Island denizens I say I love you and I am thankful for you.





2000 miles is very far in the snow

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Can't Keep The Island Up All By Myself

Just saying
tired of talking to the coconuts.

I expect a glob post here by someone by monday

so it shall be written so it shall.....oh hell i do a lousy brenner impersonation

love ya

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

THIS CANT BE HAPPENING!!!!!1111!IIII



SHE is spending her first night in a college dorm as a college student tonight?

sigh

Old is not the word right now.

But proud is! (and of her cousin Cam who has been at Texas Lutheran since Saturday)

Good luck kids.

Your family loves you

Sunday, August 1, 2010

Yeah I've Been Dwelling A Bit Latley

Latley?

OK Lately

Usually July ain't a bad month for me.

San Diego beautiful people and weather and leading up to the convention everyone is so busy my life gets a little calmer.

Not sure what drew me back to sadness about Ma and Michele last night but as long as that is not the norm I'm thinking that all right.

Love to my Island Brethren and Sisterthen?????

Thinking of you makes me smile. Thanks for that.

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Part Of The Plan

One of my favorite Dan songs

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

More Mundane Matters: With Names

Steve, you sweet, wonderful man, thank you for your call last night. It really, really helps to know that I have such awesome friends who are there no matter what. I love you, man.

Rebecca has been my rock through this. She called Keith and Nikki and Dave when I couldn't catch my breath long enough to talk. She's been holding down the fort and just generally making everything easier, talking me through it all and being there. She's a kick ass roommate...and swiftly becoming one of my best friends ever.

Keith is being...Keith. He's trying to be comforting but it winds up being about him somehow. He's with the kids, though, and by doing that he's helping me to be able to go to NY and attend the funeral. And given that we're not living together, I'm able to be more understanding and forgiving these days for whatever reason and I'm touched that he tries. After all, he's my ex--he doesn't even have to do that much. He cares and I know that. Isn't that what's important? Family. And he's family and always will be.

Dave...wow. He's fucking awesome. We've been dating a mere 4 months and he's right there every time. He says, "I'm no good at times like these" and then turns around and is absolutely amazing. He came down without me even asking (turns out Rebecca told him that he may need to--so he just did), went to my parents' house with me, stayed with me for the night even though he's got to work today, distracted me, listened to me and gave me comfort with word and body. He's...I'm out of superlatives. I'm grateful, so very grateful, that he found me. I definitely got the better end of that deal, I think.

The kids are okay. They didn't know my grandfather the way I wanted them to. We just lived too far away from each other. Nikki knew him marginally better than Richie did but, like I said, they're okay.

As for plans, no one knows anything yet. They're doing an autopsy to find out what happened but we're pretty sure he had a heart attack while he was driving. I only hope he'd already died when he hit the guard rails and went over the embankment into the ravine. I would hate to think his last moments were in pain and unable to move and the fear of trying to control the car and not being able to and worrying about hurting someone else. No, much better the other way so that's how I'll remember it. When they finally release the body, we'll know more about the funeral and so on. I'll post then but y'all know I'm going. If it's soon, I'll fly b/c it's cheaper before the holiday. After the holiday, the prices double so I'll take the bike. /shrug/ Whatever.

'Til then, thank you all for being such fantabulous friends.

http://sayingnothingcharmingly.blogspot.com/2010/06/me-and-mrs-jones-are-just-swinging.html

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Friday, June 25, 2010

Unnatural Horrors of Being An Uncle

Really this is what I have to put up with.

If you know anything about me you know I lurves me some TCU.
I'd go as far to say no one in Maryland would even know about TCU if not for me (not to mention the folks on the island of Costa Rica)

Back in the early 1800's when I was looking at colleges I had narrowed it down to three.

Texas Lutheran because we were all good Lutherans and it was not a bad school. My nephew Cam is going there this year so good thing he doesn't have to hear about "Drunk Uncle Steve" stories on that campus.

The second was the university of texas in austin (yes all small letters on purpose)but it was such a huge freaking school back then (and still is) I really did not think i had what it took to be in the middle of 30 thousand other people in school. Hell I barely graduated from Wichita Falls High School.

And my niece Taylor is going to UT much to my chagrin.

Which brings us back around to TCU (really there is a point here somewhere)

The band director at TCU (Prof as we called him Diamond Jim Jacobson as he was known in the biz)wife went to my high school and PRESTO band scholarship to TCU.

And the rest, as they say, is history.

I get home this evening and there is a package on my door. Very odd for me but also a little exciting.

It was from my sister Sheri.

Inside was a great photo of all three kids (cam Ali and Taylor) and...................A UT HAT!!!!111!!!23434!!09475094NOOEEESSSSS

We hated UT in college. We could not beat them at anything they always kicked our ass. Always!

GAHHH ERRGHHHHH

But to show how much I love Taylor here is a picture of me with a UT hat on. Cache it people 'cause it may not happen again!

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

The Great Cheeseburger Controversy Of 2010

So as everyone knows Dad was in town.
Usually I have the "cookout" that following weekend but this year Dad came in on Friday and the next Thursday we were off to Pennsylvania to play golf so the "cookout" was going to be the day after he came in or not at all.

What this meant in the grand scheme of things was golfing Saturday morning and then back to my place to entertain about 20 folks. Not that big a deal. A little rushed but nothing I couldn't handle.

And, as usual, everyone had a good time.

Later in the week Dad and I cleaned out the grill and replaced the lava rocks all that normal gas grill maintenance that needs to be done once a year or so and he says "Steve we should grill out tonight"

Which I was so cool with.

We were out having a beer and invited two friends over as well and we are grilling baybee! YEAH!

So the burgers are on the grill like 30 seconds and Dad brings out a slice of cheese. He wanted a cheeseburger which was great and this is how the conversation went:
ME: Dad what's with the slice of cheese?
Dad: I want a cheeseburger
ME: Ok well take that slice back in and when the burgers are ready were good to go and I'll put the cheese on the burger
Dad: Well I noticed you didn't put the cheese on the burgers Saturday. We always did that you know
Me: I understand that but I had like 20 burgers on the grill and didn't know what everyone wanted so I let them put cheese on thier burgers if they wanted to inside the kitchen
Dad: Welll we always put the cheese on the burger on the grill
Me: Dad I understand that and we can do that tonight. 4 burgers 4 slices of cheese we're good but take the cheese back inside or it will melt before the burgers are ready
Dad: Grumble grumble etc cheese my day etc etc

It was to laugh at.

And if the worse thing I can say is my Dad aint happy with my cheese skills when it comes to burgers on teh grill I'm doing pretty well!

Saturday, May 8, 2010

Friday, April 16, 2010

Thursday, April 8, 2010

The Best Words To Go To Go To Bed With

"Love you Bub"

And the best words to say in response "Love you too Sheri"

Nice talking with my sister this evening

Monday, April 5, 2010

A Picture Of A Cow



WHAT? Look folks I don't lie about these things.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

I Guess I Lied

But only here at the island and what happens at the island stays at the island!
(Maybe we should look into a casino or two)

A year ago tonight I was at M.D. Anderson hospital. In a couple hours visiting time would be over but the staff let us stay bit there was only room for two in the room.

Naturally we gave that to Jim and Ali and Dad, Sheri, and I went and staked our spots out around ICU to see where we could get an hours or so sleep.

And me being me I believed the signs saying "This Visitors Room Closes at 11:00" and went looking for somewhere to lay down and found a love seat in the lobby.

Not very comfortable but I hunkered down and pulled my TCU cap over my head and tried to sleep (which was off and on)but eventually April 2nd came.

Dad, Sheri and I met and had breakfast at the hospital and went back to the room and about noon Dad and I headed back to Brenham to shit shine shower and shave.

And we got the call that we all had to meet to decide what was the next step.

At this point we knew (and I am damn glad we did) what Michele wanted the next step to be. But before we took that step we met with the Doctor.

And as much as we had hoped the step would not be the step we wanted to take the step was there.

And we had to take it.

It was the only way we could be true to our sister and daughter.

At about 5:30 or so they unplugged every thing except those machines keeping her comfortable and any pain she may feel at bay.

And about 45 minutes later she died.

Here I am a year later and even typing that makes me feel so very, very selfish.

I'm a mess. For tonight.

But this will pass because I know my sister loves me. And she'll give me a pass every now and then to cry when I shouldn't, to sometimes gaze into the sunset or sunrise and go away to another time when things were a whole hell of a lot better than they are now.

And I love my sister.

And I miss her.

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Only In Texas (Or Mac and Chese and DEMOLITION!)

Or maybe a better title would be "Jerry Jones Can Sell ANYTHING"

I love my Dallas Cowboys I do I do I do.

Reading the website today there is an article about the demolition of the old Texas Stadium.

This was interesting to me as I have been to that stadium before and talks about the process of bringing it down and what the city plans to do with the land blah blah blah blah.

And this is the last paragraph:
Fireworks will precede the demolition, and the event will be emceed by ESPN's Chris Berman. Casey Rogers, an 11-year old from nearby Terrell, won an essay contest for the chance to press the final button completing the implosion, which is sponsored by Kraft Macaroni & Cheese.

How in the world do you sell naming rights to the demolition of your own stadium?

In the words of those old Guinness commercials "BRILLIANT"

Monday, March 29, 2010

I've Learned A Valuable Lesson

And before the age of 49!

If you don't want to keep spilling the cinnamon maybe moving it somewhere away from the cooking utensil you use often is not the worse idea evah.

I am now going to try this tactic and have great faith it will work out.

Saturday, March 27, 2010

Thursday, March 25, 2010

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Fort Worth (Possibly) Here I Come

So my vacation plan for this year has been for a while to get back to Fort Worth in the Spring/Summer so I could go to Scarborough Fair

My reason for this is simple.

I really want to get back to Fort Worth for a vacation.

And go to Scarborough which we did a lot when I lived there.

Ok AHEM
Amongst my reasons....... (that was for you Bob) LOL

I will also get to see Christina (yes lunch is on at LJS BABEEEEEEEE) and also one of two ex girlfriends that I still think about to this day (the other one is in CO so she probably won't be there)

Hopefully this will all work out.

And if not I will be back there the first weekend in September when the MIGHTY MIGHTY TCU HORNED FROGS open their season at Jerry-World in Arlington!!!

I love the smell of pending vacations at 9:50 on a Wednesday evening

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

I Found This Funny

So I had to take the car in to the dealer because the check engine light was on.
I don't worry about the check engine light because every time it has happened to me I either lost my gas cap or it was not on correctly and the car loss some pressure or vacuum in the line.

I took out the work order tonight to put it in my "car folder" and this is what the first 3 sentences were:
Customer states check engine light on.
Test Drove Vehicle
Check Engine light is on

Really? I brought my car in for service and it actually needed, ya know, service?
Because there is nothing I like more than to be without a car all freaking day long at work.

Turns out I needed a sensor (which the service person told me it was a hail mary they had in stock but they did).

So new sensor goes in, check engine light goes out.

But under parts they say they put in a "thruster". Hmmm if I experience any sudden uncontrolled acceleration y'all are my witness's!

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Nuance

I, like most of us, was brought up to be truthful. In fact, it was a bit of a thing in my family - no shades of grey or excuses, you just don't lie to people. No claiming to be younger to get the kid's price, no pocketing the extra if you're given the wrong change, no staying home "sick" if you're not.


And I really took it to heart. I eventually grew out of the wide-eyed absolutism of childhood, but the overall message stayed with me and while I'm not shocked-shocked-I-say at the white (and other colored) lies a lot of people are comfortable using, it's not for me. I'm not above smiling through food I don't like, but that's generally the extent of it.

Except, today I had to choose between either relaxing that standard or putting a friend's job on the line and causing trouble for the rest of the company, and of course I chose the former.

The disconcerting thing is, I think I was quite good at it. I wasn't happy about it, but the false claim I needed to make occurred to me on the spot, and I said it, and was outwardly relaxed and chatty and helped embellish it very slightly and provide the needed detail, and then sign the forms that were produced to that effect.

I'm not at all certain that the person I was dealing with in fact believed what I was telling him, but my claim was one of the few acceptable answers to the questions he was sent to ask, this is a very non-confrontational culture and it doesn't matter to him personally, so as long as we produce (in this case literally) some documentation to back it up, that should be that.

2010 is off to quite the auspicious start, innit?

Friday, January 1, 2010

Death Via Facebook

Sometimes having a super cool phone that keeps you connected ain't all that it is cracked up to be.

While I am on facebook I'm hardly ever on facebook.

I got an email tonight from someone named Cheryl who was looking for Michele there but found me instead.

It took me a long time to respond. There was only one thing I could say.

I gave her the address of the blog I started and let her know Michele had died earlier this year.

It was just an odd way to start the new year.