Monday, December 29, 2008

An Island Vlog

yeah I'm rambling but go with it

video

Saturday, December 20, 2008

I Am On You Tube Again

Another great shot if I do say so myself

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

I Remember Things Or I Am A Horible Brother You Decide

It was about 4 months before Mom died.
I was on one of my many weekend jaunts down to Texas to spend time with Mom because none of us know how much time we have left.

I got in my rent a car and headed out of the airport and was going to meet my sister at a Chile's off of FM 1960 as this was on my way (albeit in a round about way) to 290 to get up to Brenham.

So there I am sucking on a very bad margarita and my sister shows up.

And we start talking about Mom and her condition and hospice and everything else.

Now at this point, while I knew in the back of my mind that I would one day get "the call" up here in Maryland I still held out hope Ma had more time. And she did about 4 months.

But as my sister and I were talking she looked me in the eye and said very matter of factly "Steven our mother is going to die.

As I thought about what she had said I became mad. And thought bad things about my sister. Why could she not think like me?

Hey ya never know? Maybe she's drinking some of that magic water that Madonna is hawking that will cure her? Anything's possible.

It wasn't until the night of my mother's death when I saw my sister with our mother that I realized that was how she protected herself.

She didn't want Mother to die but she had accepted it and when it happened that's when everything came crashing through for her.

So fast forward to today or really this weekend.

My sister was really tired. Having not been around her a lot as she tries to kick cancer's ass I was not sure if this was normal or not and just accepted it as the way it was.

So tonight my sister is in the hospital waiting for surgery tomorrow to have a stint put in her leg because of a blood clot.

This in and of itself did not alarm me yesterday.

I called her today and she told me she also had two pints of blood in a transfusion because her blood was low.

And I flashed back to Chili's and substituted the "Mom" with "Sister".

And I don't want to type or speak or acknowledge what comes next.

At some point I'm going to have to.

But for tonight it was enough to crank up the CD player in the car in hopes it would push it back in my brain a little more.

Monday, December 8, 2008

A Few Good Thoughts Are Welcome

Michele is in the hospital tonight.
They found a blood clot in her leg when she had her MRI last week.
They will put a stint in her vein tomorrow.

Overall she seemed good this weekend just tired.

But I got to hug my sister goodnight and tell her I love her as she went to bed so what more do I want from a weekend trip?

Not a thing.

Sunday, December 7, 2008

Resentment

I'm glad it's going to work out, and that my kids are going to see their grandparents and my parents are going to see their grandkids, even if not in the way we thought and not for the actual holidays.

I'm even perfectly fine with taking the trip without the kids - assuming I do get to take the trip, which is the assumption I'm working on right now.

But you know what? Even though I do understand where it comes from, I'm a little upset at being preemptively accused of international parental kidnapping, you know?

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Forgot The First Rule Of Bar Dating

Shouldn't spend one weekend kissing one person and then a month later sleeping with another

It gets messy.

I may have to find a new bar

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

I Need To Find The Dried Monkey Head...

that will allow me to align the second set of stone circles and get the third artifact of Thor.

Does that sound unreasonable?

I don't think so.

But then again I'm inapt LOL

(Bob I didn't start the war BTW LOL)

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

How The Hell Did This Happen?

I have 55 friends on facebook?

I'm not sure I even remember that many people lol

Monday, December 1, 2008

Lessons in Bad Parenting 7: Inducing Shame

Copy of e-mail to Damien's teacher today:

Damien's Lack of $ today

Dear Mrs. Damien's-Teacher,


I wanted to explain why Damien didn't have lunch money today. His dad and I gave him enough for breakfast and lunch for the day this morning. He is forever being told to put his money in his pocket when we give it to him. He did not do so this morning and left it on the couch.

When we got to school, he demanded that I go home to get it for him. When I explained that I was already late for work and could not go back to the house, he threw his backpack to the ground, kicked it across the parking lot and started to scream at me.

That more or less guaranteed that the sun would rise in the west and devils would ice skate before he got that money.

And that is why Damien did not have money for lunch or breakfast this morning.

Thanks.

Sincerely,

Me
It's a good thing I didn't have children so I could have someone to love me. Heh.