Friday, April 25, 2008

Update: Lesson #5 in Bad Parenting (Mean Mom Edition)

The Boy refuses to get ready in the morning. All he has to do is brush his hair and teeth, eat a bowl of cereal and get dressed. I wake him at 6:30AM to do these things. I need to leave at 7:30AM to be on time for work. Well, he's made me late I haven't been able to get to work before 8:10AM in I don't know how long. Sometimes, I've been as late as 9AM.

Yesterday, I broke. I'd had it. I had been yelling and fussing at the child all morning until my throat was hoarse and I didn't get to work until 8:30AM. That was the limit, y'all. The Limit.

I went home last night and told him that we would be leaving from now on at 7:30AM and he would go to school in whatever state he happened to be in--pajamas, half-dressed, I didn't care.

He didn't think I was serious.

This morning, I got him up at 6:30AM, as usual. I reminded him of the new rule. Then, I got ready. I did not holler, fuss or fight with the child.

At 7:30AM, I put him under my arm, carried him to the car, took him to school and put him out on the sidewalk with, "I love you. Have a great day, son." I got to work on time for the first time in weeks.

He stood on the sidewalk, in a bit of shock, with messed up hair, dragon breath, no shirt and no shoes.

(I put a shirt, shoes, toothbrush, toothpaste and a hairbrush in his backpack. I'm not THAT mean, people. He's just lucky he had on underwear and pants, that's all I'm saying.)

UPDATE: Everyone laughed at him (and me). He's mad at me but he tells me that he'll be ready at 7:30AM Monday morning. I'll update again then. But other things got in the way.


Brave Sir Robin said...

You are the best mother in the history of the world!!!!!!!!!!!!!


FSM, I hope you took a picture to show him on Prom night.

pidomon said...

we want a photo!

PortlyDyke said...

You HAVE to post an update on this, or I will die of curiosity. I had do this once -- just once. However, you might get some "pushback" -- take a page from Cesar Milan's book: Calm and assertive.

I had a friend whose son was so stubborn that she had to do it three days in a row, but once she stopped arguing and just went "uhm-hmm" when he went on about how she's was an awful mommy, and he figured out that he was going to look like an idiot coming to school that way every day, it worked.

You are a fantastic mother, and he will have this story to tell his children. :LOL:

Gine said...

You are My Hero.


Bob said...


When I was li'l (yes, I was once ... well, relatively so), the bus went past our house to the end of the road to pick up the kids that lived in the house there and then back to get me. About 15 minutes there and back.

I would get up when the bus went past, and would be ready when it got back.

And then I'd often fall asleep on the bus, until it got full enough that I didn't have a seat to myself (the back seat, of course).

Jennifer said...

That was sooooo the right thing to do.

PortlyDyke said...

I'm clinging BY. A. THREAD. to my every breath, because I am DYING of curiosity!!! Help!! Gasp!!! Somebody (*cough*cristina*cough*) throw me an UPDATE!!!!!

Christina said...

I did not want to be responsible for your expiration from curiosity, so I updated. I'll do it again on Monday to see how the whole morning thing goes.

ouyangdan said...

i have had to do the same thing recently. at the Kid's school we have to take a parent teacher workshop our first year. we actually addressed the morning routine in the class. the advice was similar to your idea.

set the time limit.

get ready.

when the time limit lapses, you leave. if the Kid isn't ready, she stays home (if you are able to provide someone for this), but not as a free day. she stays home cleaning, doing homework, reading, etc, things that are boring. for my Kid it is punishment b/c she doesn't get to go and see her friends. surprisingly (well, not really if you know my Kid's school) the teacher is on board w/ this.

i will try your method on days i don't have someone to stay home w/ her.

other creative punishments i have come up w/?

the Kid has trouble remembering to flush the toilet, now we all call her in to flush our crap when we go. the other day she came out and said "that's gross, mommy!"

i think she is catching on!