An Island Vlog

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yeah I'm rambling but go with it

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Lot Of Triggers This Week For Some Reason

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I'm not sure what set anything off this week. I just had some very vivid images of Michele at M.D. Anderson, non responsive, with machines beeping and binging, and never opening her eyes while I was there. I had vivid memories of the family meeting with the doctor and making sure Michele's wishes were carried out. I had vivid memories this week of the machines getting quieter and quieter. It seems like yesterday that after her son and daughter said goodbye that I went in the hospital ICU room to get whatever was still in there so they didn't have to. And for some reason the image in my head was looking at Michele, her dead body, knowing she was the best of us and had drawn the short straw,and missing her as much in that moment as I do right now. I love you Michele. Your the best sister a brother could ever ask for.
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Blog note

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I tried adding a second address to Blogger's comment notification field, but it won't take one. So I did what Phy suggested and set up a filter so comments get mailed to me, then automatically forwarded to him. Pido, let me know if you want to get an E-mail whenever somebody leaves a comment here and I'll add you to it. Also switched the timestamps over to Eastern time. Seemed more appropriate than Pacific. And gave pidomon admin privileges, ceiling cat help us all.
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I Remember Things Or I Am A Horible Brother You Decide

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It was about 4 months before Mom died. I was on one of my many weekend jaunts down to Texas to spend time with Mom because none of us know how much time we have left. I got in my rent a car and headed out of the airport and was going to meet my sister at a Chile's off of FM 1960 as this was on my way (albeit in a round about way) to 290 to get up to Brenham. So there I am sucking on a very bad margarita and my sister shows up. And we start talking about Mom and her condition and hospice and everything else. Now at this point, while I knew in the back of my mind that I would one day get "the call" up here in Maryland I still held out hope Ma had more time. And she did about 4 months. But as my sister and I were talking she looked me in the eye and said very matter of factly "Steven our mother is going to die. As I thought about what she had said I became mad. And thought bad things about my sister. Why could she not think like me? Hey ya never know? Maybe she...
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